History of Mom Part II, 40's and 50's.

So, after researching this dreadful disease, I discussed all of my findings with my mother. I said, "Mom, I'm pretty worried, you know they say Alzheimer's skips every generation, and since your mom didn't have it, I wonder if you or I will have it." She said she was worried too, and once told me if she ever didn't know who I was it was time for her to leave this earth. Ironically we aren't at that stage yet, but I know one day we will be.

Here is an excerpt from a study about the genetics of Alzheimers

Advances in genetic research are also helping to unlock some of Alzheimer's mysteries. So far, researchers have discovered four genes that can lead to the disease, including two that Dr. Peter St George-Hyslop and his team at the University of Toronto identified within a two-month period in 1995. The genes are responsible for a rare form of the disease called Familial Autosomal Dominant Alzheimer's. FAD, which is clearly passed from one generation to the next, accounts for five to 10 per cent of Alzheimer's cases. While people with FAD may develop symptoms as young as 30, the disease appears similar to the more common, so-called sporadic Alzheimer's in every other way. Thus by studying the rare form, says St George-Hyslop, director of the university's Centre for Research in Neurodegenerative Diseases, scientists hope to learn more about Alzheimer's in general. Meanwhile, the hunt is on to discover other genes linked to the disease. "I suspect in the next few years," says St George-Hyslop, "we will know a lot more about the genetics."

Source: Maclean's March 13, 2000

Author BARBARA WICKENS

During my mom's 40's and 50's she continued to work and have a pretty fulfilling life. She never did marry, and never really even dated, stating that she would never be able to meet another man as good as my father. When my mom was about 59 and a half, I guess you could say I started to notice little things. I had moved across the country shortly before, and I spoke with my mother on the phone almost daily. The first thing we noticed is that my mom had become very 'jumpy.' The only way to describe this is to say that she was anxious. If someone walked up behind her and she couldn't hear them well, she'd scream or yell. Now, of course, everyone does this sometimes, but my mom would do it 2-3 times a day. I look back now and see this as some sort of sign. I know science isn't that far along, but I wonder how many other caregivers or children of parents with Alzheimer's have noticed this trait. It would be an interesting study if nothing else. This odd quirk of my mothers got so bad that at work, people would have to say "Here we come, we are coming down the hall. .don't be scared!" so that she wouldn't jump when people got into her office at work.

Another thing I noticed is that mom seemed to not be as involved in things she once was. Now, she still did most of her hobbies, but the lack of enthusiasm become more evident each year. It got to the point that one year, I gave her a book for Christmas and her response was, "oh I really don't read much anymore." This was the response coming from a woman who read 1-2 books a week her entire life.

I also remember friends telling me that she was having a hard time at work. She seemed very stressed when she had to learn something new. She kept telling everyone she was getting 'too old for this.'

Holidays didn't seem as important to her. She decided in 2004 that she wasn't going to put a tree up this year, even though I was bringing my 5 year old to her house for Christmas. When I tried to explain how important it was to have a tree, she didn't seem to understand. Maybe it was that she couldn't empathize? This was not characteristic of my mother. She always took such great care in making sure the holidays were memorable occasions when I was growing up. She would spend hours cooking old family recipes and would always have the house all decorated when I came to visit, even when I didn't have children. I actually bought her a tree that year, and she did put it up, but it seemed more out of guilt than out of understanding?

In 2005, she became wrapped up in sweepstakes scams. I won't go into all the details but I will say that it became very apparent to me by 2005 that there was something wrong with my mother. I begged her to go to the doctor. I pleaded. . I called. . I researched. . it didn't make any difference. She thought she was fine. She became very involved in gambling. Suddenly going to the casino's wasn't just a fun once a year activity, but it became more of a passion. She started going every chance she could. She would drive herself, spend the night playing and drive back all in the same 24 hour period. My mother grew up going to church 4 times a week. Gambling was not something she ever did. I didn't have a problem with it at first, but eventually it became apparent that it was more than just a hobby.

Another issue was that a family member was abusing drugs, and my mother refused to not only acknowledge this, but to believe it. It didn't matter how much proof you showed her, she for some reason couldn't comprehend that this person, whom she loved could actually be taking drugs.

After all of these odd things going on, along with the fact that my mom was starting to substitute words like boat for ship, or lemon for lime, I felt it was time to go to the doctor.

I bought plane tickets and flew to see my mom. I spent the week with her, and drove her to doctors appointments. I finally got her in to see her Primary Care Physician only to be told that "If your mother doesn't want to be on medication for Alzheimers, I can't make her take it." She says she's fine and she seems to be ok. . .

I could have strangled that doctor. I still to this day hold a grudge. I know you are supposed to forgive, but had that doctor listened to me, maybe my mother wouldn't be where she is now.

She wasn't 'ok.'